What we know as Holy Week must have been a rollercoaster for the disciples. During the time they had spent following Jesus, they must have been both buoyed up by their belief that Jesus was the Messiah, cheered by the radical and positive things he said and did, but equally aware that Jesus wasn’t everyone’s cup of tea and that many opposed both his teachings and him as a person. And more, that there were some who wanted him dead and gone.
Then comes Passover, the greatest feast of the calendar when as many as can go up to Jerusalem, to celebrate God’s mercy and power as witnessed by the escape of God’s people from the powers of evil, from the hand of pharaoh, from the constraints of slavery and their release into a new era of freedom and prosperity. Each year, even if only with a small fraction of their minds, the worshippers must have been hoping that this would be the year for a repeat performance. And if nothing else, this was always a time to celebrate their certainty that they were God’s chosen people, that they had a long history of a special relationship with God.
The disciples must have felt the joy and fervour and anticipation of this feast too – and in part of their minds must have thought this is when Jesus will reveal to everyone the special relationship he had with God, and that God would reciprocate with such acts of power and wonder that life would never be the same again! And then their they are, retrieving a donkey as part of some prepared plan, and following Jesus into Jerusalem at the head of such a throng of pilgrims, all waving branches, laying their cloaks on the road and shouting out loud that this – Jesus – is the Son of David – the Messiah! Not even the Pharisees could stop them.
But at the same time, there may also have been the sneaking fear in their minds that this could all go wrong. Jesus is turning over the tables in the Temple, challenging the long held sacramental practices of the Temple. He is openly challenging the religious authorities with his teachings and pronouncements. Is he poking the bees nest rather too rashly?
Would the disciples have been questioning their own faith? Surely if their trust is in Jesus they must trust that these risks have to be taken? And accept their share of the risk? But equally are they not Jesus’s chosen team? Their commitment to Jesus maybe teetering in a knife edge. Is this really going to work out well – or not? Is this really God’s plan?
The meal in the upper room, Jesus’s words about the bread as ‘My Body’, the wine as ‘My Blood’, must have sharpened these tensions. The prayers in the Garden of Gethsemane, the arrival of the soldiers, Jesus’s arrest. What will happen next?
Will it be a dramatic dénouement of Jesus’s real identity and power? Or will it be crushing denouement of the vulnerability of the whole movement?
If the former, when will it happen? It doesn’t happen when Jesus is arrested. It doesn’t happen when he is brought before Herod – the so called King of the Jews – nor when he is brought before Pilate – the representative of the power of the ungodly empire? It doesn’t happen when Pilate offers the people a choice between Jesus and Barabbas. It doesn’t happen on the slopes of Golgotha. If not now, then when?
As the disciples watched Jesus die, their hopes must have drained away, their blood chilled, their hearts crushed. Would they be next? Had they all been over optimistic, too ahead of themselves, too ready to believe that now was the time? Should they have tried to rescue Jesus before it as too late? Should they not have come to Jerusalem at all? Could they have dissuaded Jesus?
I don’t think anything Jesus could have said could have fully prepared them for this. And yet it is a place we often find ourselves today: looking at a world where everything seems to be going wrong, where all our hopes appear unfounded, when all our efforts seem fruitless. It can be all too easy to doubt, loose hope and give up.
I can understand the two disciples who choose to up sticks and return home (travelling via Emmaus). I can equally understand Mary Magdalene who wants to do the only do thing she can do – sit in the garden by the tomb, be as close to his remains as possible and simply be.
For none of the disciples is it obvious that Jesus’s death is not the end. None of them is prepared for the resurrection and, even when it happens, they are still filled with doubts and fears. It takes time for them to get a grasp of what is happening, of what it means for Jesus to rise from the dead. And maybe that is where many of us are.
Jesus’s resurrection did not change the world. Life for most people continued on the Sunday just as it had on any previous day. The sun still rose and set. The Romans were still in power. The pilgrims were still celebrating Passover. Trade and daily life went on as usual.
But for those who knew Jesus, those who were part of his community, those who met the risen Jesus, life did change. It may have taken a few days, few weeks even, to embrace what had happened and later – with the gift of the Holy Spirit – to be able to fully inhabit this new life. But since then the number and influence of those who have become part of the resurrection story has increased exponentially.
So what is the message of the cross? That life is not straight forward, that it is a roller coaster as kindness comes up against callousness, as generosity of heart comes up against greed, as wisdom comes up against ignorance, as life enhancing actions compete with life diminishing actions, as ‘good’ comes up against ‘evil’. But nevertheless God’s love will prevail. That nevertheless empowered by God’s love, individuals and communities can make a difference; that the way of life that Jesus inhabited is one that we can live; that we will not live this life alone but with and in the living, lively presence of the risen Jesus. For as in baptism we are joined with Christ, so in the resurrection we are imbued with Christ. We are part of the presence of Christ on earth. Like Jesus we live lives that can be like a roller coaster but they are, nevertheless, lives with a purpose and a direction. Lives that bring to life the kingdom of God here on earth. Lives that speak of change, of love and joy and mercy. There will be times when we feel bereft or defeated or inadequate. There will be times when we feel invigorated, overjoyed and elated. Through all we will always be held in the love of God
The Green Tau 